Lighting candles in remembrance of the deceased. Meanwhile, the grandson of the deceased wears a hat and white robe; son-in-law and brothers wear white long shirts, and sisters use twisted white fabric to tie her hair. (Note: In Vietnamese culture, odd numbers are typically considered to be lucky. Depending on the religious affiliations of the family, it's common to wear white or dark colors as a sign of respect and mourning. Typically, the family plays a key role in shaping a ceremony, as do monks or priests. Respect for elders and the deceased is of the utmost importance in Vietnamese culture, and funerals are an opportunity to show respect for the deceased. Now you can focus on leaving a legacy instead of a mess. Ethnic groups, like the Hmong, slaughter cows to make sure the deceased travels into the afterlife. In this guide, well break down the history, traditions, and etiquette at Vietnamese funerals. CopingWith the First Thanksgiving Without Your Loved One, It can be difficult to adapt to life after the loss of a loved one, and it might seem like things will never go back to being the same. The purpose of Dam Gio is to provide offerings to passed loved ones, so they are comfortable wherever they are. Catholicism is another popular religion among Vietnamese families, and as such, the funeral for the deceased may follow common Catholic traditions. Close family members wear white or yellow headbands to signal their close ties to the deceased. Embalming and organ donation are acceptable in the Catholic faith. The traditional diet is mostly rice, fish, and vegetables, plus pork or chicken when available. Our expert guidance can make your life a little easier during this time. In the past, a Vietnamese funeral could last up to a month or more. During this time, families will gather together to offer prayers and offerings to the deceased. This event is usually celebrated once a year, and it can be in honor of more than one family member who has passed away. In traditional burials of some sects, the deceased's clothing and other belongings are burned. Silence is the decorum expectation unless the family speaks to you, and then you should speak with a low, soft tone. *Standard property includes mausoleums, niches, urn gardens and select lawns (10% savings). Some families also include a large red or vibrantly colored banner that hangs down as the background of the altar. The deceased continues to lives as an ancestor. First, its important to see that ancestor worship is common, even encouraged, for Vietnam Catholics. From the colors of dress to the length of visitation, the characteristics of a Vietnamese funeral ceremony are significant yet varied. Get started by downloading our funeral planning guide or contact an advisor today. For information about opting out, click here. The Western trumpet band is also mainly used in the South, usually playing at Cloth Wrapping and Body Placing stages, and when moving the coffin to its final resting place, but the family can request the music to be played whenever. Wearing a mourning headband is not only to show affection and respect, but it is also used to distinguish the relationship between the deceased and the wearers, who may not be very familiar. Kelley, Liam c. Confucianism in Vietnam: A State of the Field Essay. Journal of Vietnamese Studies, Vol. When the two-day celebration concludes, it is customary for hosts to offer their guests Vietnamese cakes to take home. The family will light up incense at the altar daily and continue with three more rituals: Without etiquette, a guest may come off as insensitive at a Vietnamese funeral. The reason for this very cruel custom is explained in a very simple way, which is because life in the deep mountains in the past was inherently poor and harsh. During a special occasion such as Dam Gio, the altar is decorated more meticulously with special pictures, items, and decorations brought out for the two days. . The Vietnamese funeral you attend in the U.S. may have some of the traditions above or all of them. Vietnamese Because of exposure to Agent Orange during the Vietnam War, older Vietnamese immigrants are potentially at risk for cancers, immune deficiency, endocrine disruption, and neurological damage. Join our feeds to automatically receive the latest headlines, news, and information formatted for your club's website or news reader. Most Vietnamese Buddhists Belong to the Mahayana school. This link will open in a new window. This website uses cookies to improve your experience. The burial is another time for the family to grieve and say their last goodbye. According to the Vietnamese concept, death is not an end but they just move to another world, reunite with their ancestors, and then there will come a time for the living to meet those who have passed away. Family members and close friends prepare the body by washing and dressing the deceased in their best suit of clothes. Twitter. It is considered bad luck for menstruating women to light incense. There are customs followed depending on the familys Buddhist or Catholic preference. As a unique part of culture and one of the oldest customs of the country, Vietnamese funerals include many strict procedures, rites and regulations, in terms of costumes, music, food, etc. Let dogs, cats, or mice jump over the coffin, Cry too much or let tears fall on to the deceaseds body. They often keep their loved one at home after their death for anywhere ranging from three days to a month. If youre a close family member youll wear a white robe or hat. arent played at Buddhist ceremonies. Odd numbers are considered lucky by the Vietnamese, and when lighting incense, guests should choose three or five sticks, with three being the ideal. Close relatives are invited for the two days of celebration, and they stay at the house of the host to help with preparations for the last day, which is most important. Worshiping ancestors is not only a channel to show respect and honor, but is also a channel to ask for favors and divine help. According to Vietnamese funeral traditions, when the person is out of breath, a chopstick is placed across the jaw to prevent teeth from grinding together and some rice, and three coins (or gold) are put in so that the dead person does not turn into a hungry ghost. All rights reserved. Vietnamese Author Dieu-Hien T. Hoang describes her uncle's death, recalling how each family member "used their talent to "serve" [her] uncle [on his deathbed].". Download your FREE planning guide today. Generally, services will last around an hour to an hour and a half, depending on the size and scope of the service. Traditionally, children of the deceased dress in white gauze clothes and matching hats. In addition to the beliefs and customs associated with Vietnamese funerals, there are also some traditional superstitions and beliefs surrounding death that you may encounter while attending a funeral service. Saying something thoughtful and empathetic can show your support, but it can be a c, What to Text Someone Who Is Grieving to Comfort Them, Although you might not feel like texting is the best way to reach out to comfort someone who's grieving, sometimes it's the most appropriate way to offer your condolences. Visitations include an open casket and may last several days. It is like commemorating a president's first 100 days in office. Vietnam or Viet Nam (Vietnamese: Vit Nam, [vt nm] ), officially the Socialist Republic of Vietnam, is a country in Southeast Asia. Celebrating a Death Anniversary in Vietnam. Later, the family sends photographic mementos to family and friends that couldn't attend. Because the Vietnamese often attach great importance to their roles, it will help visitors not have to ask more questions, especially on the day of the funeral when the family is sure to be grieving and busy. Vietnamese believe a persons soul wanders after death. Around the world, everyone celebrates birthdays, but in Vietnam, they celebrate other important dates a little differently. Death Rituals in Vietnamese Society. December 01, 2000, www.webs01.hsl.washington.edu/clinical/end-of-life/death-in-viet, Phung, Tuyen. Some families also include a large red or vibrantly colored banner that hangs down as the background of the altar. Contrary to what some might believe, this is not perceived as a sorrowful occasion. Many users would be better served consulting an attorney than using a do-it-yourself online In popular Vietnamese culture, the animistic folk religions were melded with, rather than supplanted by religions such as Hinduism, Buddhism, Confucianis Rose Hills associates speak many languages, including English and Vietnamese, and are well-versed in Vietnamese cultural traditions. Each region, each ethnic group will have different customs and habits, so the music used in a Vietnam funeral will also vary, bringing different atmospheres of the funerals. Keep reading to find out. Particularly, if the death is recent or hasnt exceeded two years, its important to be sensitive about what is communicated to the grieving family. Once the family table is set with all the food, the eldest member of the family prays in front of the altar to invite spirits into the home. EN. The following anecdote detailing the death rituals of a Vietnamese family demonstrates that such rituals can have a therapeutic effect on the dying and bereaved. Usage of any form or other service on our website is Hoang, Dieu-Hien. For the Vietnamese, death, and the ritual and practice of ancestor worship, constitutes the transfer of power from the tangible life to the intangible. The deceased is washed once more and dressed in white clothing, then placed in the casket. The first stage is called " Nhap Quan " (Entering the Coffin). The Vietnamese celebrate this event and invite the spirits of their family members to visit their home and fulfill their filial responsibilities. Easily publish a free obituary, share funeral details, collect memories and more. Most people in Vietnam have a ghost story: from a butterfly landing on them during a funeral to strange voices at night. Note:No matter what a family's culture and traditions are, planning or attending a funeral is hard. White flowersespecially the white lotus, which symbolizes purification and regenerationare appropriate. In modern times, and for practicalitys sake, home altars are now set up to ease the deceaseds journey into becoming an ancestor. It even has its own nameo ng B. Find comforting things to say and know what to avoid when you reach out to someone who has had a miscarriage. Now you can focus on leaving a legacy instead of a mess. Therefore, since 2015, the local government has carried out many educational activities to help the Mong people here change in accordance with new cultural lifestyles and fine customs of the nation. Strong family members will turn the coffin in a way that its head faces the altar and its end faces the door. It only takes 5 minutes. Depending on the position of each person in the family, their mourning time for the deceased is different, representing a long-standing civilization with hierarchical order and strict rules. 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